Authentic:  true to one's own personality, spirit, or character

Transparent: free from pretense or deceit 

Courage:  mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty

Last night I went to a Chris Tomlin concert with my family.  Not just my immediate family, but lots of unknown family.  As a Christian, I believe that those who have put their hope in Christ are my family, not just in this life but the life to come.  And so as I looked out on the sea of faces that filled the Target Center, faces unfamiliar, faces with eyes that I've never looked into, dreams that I've never listened to, smiles I've never received, I felt at home.  Because together, we were worshipping God.  Loving God.  And that feels so right and so pure in a time and age when we so rarely have time to worship or love Someone unseen and faraway.  

But I digress.  In that space, filled with impressive lights and chest reverberating sounds, I had a thought.  An idea.  Perhaps a little nudge from the One who made me.  Maybe I should write again.  But not just write.  Maybe I should write authentically.  Transparently.  And as the idea sinks in and then takes flight, Maybe I should write courageously.  

As can be clearly seen, I have not written a blog post in awhile.  And do you want to know why? ... It feels too vulnerable.  Too real.  Too open and honest.  Because I'm not a person to write about fluff.  Things with no substance.  I want to be real in my words and speech, and I can't write any other way.  But that becomes messy.  Because we live in a world that does not want to hear certain things.  Messy things.  Real things.  Oh, they claim they want to hear.  But in actuality, in reality, when it's all said and done, I don't think it's true.  Why?  Because sometimes others' words and perspective cause us to be angry.  Or afraid.  Or to question things that we thought we had figured out.  

Well my disclaimer is this:  This space is for me to write.  To write what I think and feel;  To write what I believe;  To write what is important to me.  Why?  Because I think when we do this, when we are authentic to our true selves, it makes a difference.  Maybe just inside of us.  Maybe to others.  But in the end, I hope it makes matters to God.  Because it's His glory that can be seen in our weaknesses and vulnerabilities.  When we are weak, He is strong. 

xxoo 
Jackie